Be Kind, that is a true religion

Why do we avoid being kind to some people in some circumstances and find it more comfortable in other situations with other people?

Kindness starts at home. It’s about living with integrity, knowing what our principles and important ethical characteristics are, and what right and wrong mean in our life. We usually talk and hear about kindness concerning other people, but kindness towards ourself is just as important. I think how we treat and speak to ourself becomes the foundation from which we approach our other relationships. So kindness isn’t just about how we treat other people, it’s about extending the same intentions and behaviours to ourselves too.

"Being kind isn't the same as being nice"

I think this is one of the biggest confusions around the true meaning of kindness. Being kind does not always look like being ‘nice.’ Having a ‘pleasant disposition’ does not mean always making other people happy. Sometimes kindness means disappointing other people. The way I see the difference between being kind and being nice is this: “Kindness” is based on our ethics, our values, and our own beliefs “Niceness” is based on how other people see us

Sometimes kindness is difficult. Sometimes it means saying 'No'. Kindness is rooted in empathy and acceptance

Empathy is the ability to understand someone else’s situation, experience, feelings, and behaviours, and it’s the foundation of this concern. If we want to be generous towards or help someone, first we need to understand where they are and what they’re dealing with—the good and the bad. Even if we don’t agree with someone’s choices or behaviours and we decide not to enable them going forward, we can still empathise with them

And when we want to help someone, it’s doing so based on a genuine compassion for a fellow human being or creature, not to create a debt or try to make ourself look good. Kindness is acting without expectation of reciprocity or recognition, although there’s nothing wrong with enjoying those things or the good feelings showing kindness generates within us.